Sorry for this offtopic but it's damn funny )) I could not hold it!
Why it is good to be a man?
1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
2. Your orgasms are real. Always.
3. Your last name stays put.
4. The garage is all yours.
5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.
9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
10. Same work .. more pay.
11. Wrinkles-add character.
12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
17. One mood, ALL the damn time.
18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.
19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase.
20. You can open all your own jars.
26. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me.".
27. No maxi-pads.
28. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
29. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
30. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
31. You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes.
32. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
33. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
Here is another list with robocops directives! ( robocop 2)
Robocop's new directives are:
DIRECTIVE 233 Restrain hostile feelings
DIRECTIVE 234 Promote positive attitude
DIRECTIVE 235 Suppress aggressiveness
DIRECTIVE 236 Promote pro-social values
DIRECTIVE 246 Don't rush traffic lights (repeated below)
DIRECTIVE 254 Encourage awareness
DIRECTIVE 256 Discourage harsh language
DIRECTIVE 258 Commend sincere efforts
DIRECTIVE 261 Talk things out
DIRECTIVE 262 Avoid Orion meetings
DIRECTIVE 266 Smile
DIRECTIVE 267 Keep an open mind
DIRECTIVE 268 Encourage participation
DIRECTIVE 273 Avoid stereotyping
DIRECTIVE 278 Seek non-violent solutions
DIRECTIVE 238 Avoid destructive behavior
DIRECTIVE 239 Be accessible
DIRECTIVE 240 Participate in group activities
DIRECTIVE 241 Avoid interpersonal conflicts
DIRECTIVE 242 Avoid premature value judgements
DIRECTIVE 243 Pool opinions before expressing yourself
DIRECTIVE 244 Discourage feelings of negativity and hostility
DIRECTIVE 245 If you haven't got anything nice to say don't talk
DIRECTIVE 246 Don't rush traffic lights
DIRECTIVE 247 Don't run through puddles and splash pedestrians or other cars
DIRECTIVE 248 Don't say that you are always prompt when you are not
DIRECTIVE 249 Don't be oversensitive to the hostility and negativity of others
DIRECTIVE 250 Don't walk across a ballroom floor swinging your arms
)) I could not hold it!
